pandatreasure (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
pandatreasure) wrote2017-12-24 12:44 am
pandatreasure) wrote2017-12-24 12:44 am
GRAVEYARD
[You know you must have died—nothing is ever easy around here, certainly not quick, so you must remember burning, bleeding, falling, dying?
And yet. You're waking up.
Do you recognize it here, once you pick yourself up off of the hard floor, maybe half-strewn across a couch or beanbag chair? This room died, too: you're in the library, good as new and maybe better than that, only barely smelling of burnt paper and you only sometimes kick up ash, just like those old wounds that finished you off only ache every now and again, dully.
The book selection isn't quite the same as you remember it—all the bad erotica that didn't die is missing here, sorry to say, but so are the books on everyone's home worlds. Snoop around enough and behind the librarian's desk, you'll find tablets: one for each participant of the game, and with enough experimentation, you'll find the one that reacts when you press the button. You're already logged into your Recyclr account and can read the feed, but the same rules apply: 140 characters, one tweet a day. The voting app is gone, replaced by a sort of security monitoring kind of app. Characters can view different rooms of the school, or even place a few side by side so they can view a few at a time, and they'll be able to see the living go about their day to day lives. There's even an archive of recordings, but only the important ones: murders, executions, investigations, trial highlight reels, and major events like libraries being burned down. Was watching yourself die once not enough? Boy have I got good news for you!!!
It's kind of exciting that you can go around touching stuff, probably, despite being super dead and vaguely transparent in a way you notice like your own breathing; you don't and then you do and it's all you can think about, but your tangibility only extends to the inanimate: try to touch any of your fellow deceased and you'll find that you just pass right on through like touching cold air.
The windows aren't bolted up with those big metal plates on this side of things, but look out of them anytime and it's just pitch-black and still outside, so that's demoralizing. There is, of course, the door out of the library—but for now it's locked up tight. Whatever is a ghost to do?]
((Recyclr
Offerings/Letters
Day 11
Day 14
Day 16))
And yet. You're waking up.
Do you recognize it here, once you pick yourself up off of the hard floor, maybe half-strewn across a couch or beanbag chair? This room died, too: you're in the library, good as new and maybe better than that, only barely smelling of burnt paper and you only sometimes kick up ash, just like those old wounds that finished you off only ache every now and again, dully.
The book selection isn't quite the same as you remember it—all the bad erotica that didn't die is missing here, sorry to say, but so are the books on everyone's home worlds. Snoop around enough and behind the librarian's desk, you'll find tablets: one for each participant of the game, and with enough experimentation, you'll find the one that reacts when you press the button. You're already logged into your Recyclr account and can read the feed, but the same rules apply: 140 characters, one tweet a day. The voting app is gone, replaced by a sort of security monitoring kind of app. Characters can view different rooms of the school, or even place a few side by side so they can view a few at a time, and they'll be able to see the living go about their day to day lives. There's even an archive of recordings, but only the important ones: murders, executions, investigations, trial highlight reels, and major events like libraries being burned down. Was watching yourself die once not enough? Boy have I got good news for you!!!
It's kind of exciting that you can go around touching stuff, probably, despite being super dead and vaguely transparent in a way you notice like your own breathing; you don't and then you do and it's all you can think about, but your tangibility only extends to the inanimate: try to touch any of your fellow deceased and you'll find that you just pass right on through like touching cold air.
The windows aren't bolted up with those big metal plates on this side of things, but look out of them anytime and it's just pitch-black and still outside, so that's demoralizing. There is, of course, the door out of the library—but for now it's locked up tight. Whatever is a ghost to do?]
((Recyclr
Offerings/Letters
Day 11
Day 14
Day 16))
no subject
Ichigo's talked to a lot of people too, while Akira was away for a few hours. It all generally just made him feel worse, culminating with talking to Rin - and afterwards, he'd just returned to his beanbag, practically curling up in it, lying on his side and staring out blankly at a wall.
He hears the dragging, the sitting down - and he can't think of who it would be before Akira's voice rings out.
...Why so soon? He'd thought that his response would have scared him off, made him not want to see Ichigo anymore -
No. No, he can do this. All he has to do...is do what he's always done.
It takes him a second, not even giving any indication that he's heard - before turning around with a smile that would never be on his face in any other situation, a fake smile that doesn't reach his eyes even though he's trying so hard to act like nothing is wrong.
Slamming his mask firmly back into place, rolling up into a ball and protecting his already injured softness.]
Ah, no. I'll see if they recorded it so I can watch it later.
[His voice is even cheery and fake, none of any of the genuine warmth contained inside of it - just emptiness.]
I'm glad they don't have to deal with that thing anymore, though - it was bad enough when it was just following me around. I'm bet they're glad to be rid of it, right?
[There's a laugh, but just like the rest of his act - it's so very, very fake.]
no subject
[also? he sees through that act, because it's about as transparent as their ghostly bodies. there's a moment's pause, before he hoists himself up, so he's more on Ichigo's level. he totally isn't going to respond to that false cheer, as glad as he is that the major award is no longer following them around. so, he gets straight to it]
Do you remember what you told me, the night after we almost got ourselves killed?
no subject
[For a moment, he falters - that cheer falling into a hole, his mask slipping temporarily by the mention of that night - but then it's lifted back into place, although it's clearly strained.]
I said a lot back then, and my memory isn't always the greatest.
no subject
[. . . funny how that worked out]
You told me that I wasn't your leader. That I shouldn't feel guilty for dragging you into that room with me because you went willingly, as my partner. Not a follower. You asked me to let you support me, and. . . I did.
[he draws one knee up, and rests his chin against it]
Last night, I told you all of the reasons why I didn't come to you with my plan. They're all true. But--
[. . .]
[a tiny, barely perceptible shrug]
All that reasoning was the logic of a leader. Of someone used to making the tough decisions for the good of the whole. Of someone used to carrying and supporting others, even when things are tough. Of someone. . . stupidly willing to break himself and his bonds for the sake of others.
You told me last night that I didn't betray you because I confessed and stopped you from implicating Hiyori, but-- is that really true?
no subject
It takes him a while to gather up his thoughts, again. Because while he meant it at the time - that he wasn't betrayed - it took him being here to realize that he did feel betrayed, just a little. Because -
...Because this was something he should have been able to handle together with Akira.
When he finally speaks, it's quiet, low - with that pain from before clearly present in his voice as he stares straight ahead.]
...Why didn't you trust me enough to tell me what you did?
[He sucks in a breath, bringing up his legs to hug them to his chest.]
...it's not like I don't have any blood on my hands. I've had to kill to save people - more blood wouldn't make a difference.
[And honestly? Given enough time to calm down...he would have most likely had to make a decision between what he believed in and the person he cared for.
And Akira would have won.]
no subject
[he replies, even and firm, trying to make sure there is no room for doubt in those words. it was never a matter of not trusting Ichigo. . . it was--]
But I was thinking like a leader. Like someone who wanted to protect you, no matter the cost. Not like a partner.
[going to Akechi had made so much more sense in his mind at the time, despite their history. Akechi had experience with this. Akechi could make his false alibi more believable. Akechi could keep a secret. Akechi wouldn't try to talk him out of it, or try to make himself Akira's victim]
[and while all of that is true? well. Akira tilts his head slightly, searching out Ichigo's gaze with his own]
. . . and I'm sorry. About that.
no subject
He lets out a shuddering breath he didn't even know he was holding in at that, his hands reflexively tightening on his legs, fingers digging into hakama fabric, looking over - just in time for Akira to lock his eyes on him, his single one showing just how vulnerable he is in this moment.
Akira had wanted to protect him - him, even though he was the one who was supposed to be protecting others - and if Ichigo was in his place, then he'd probably do the same thing, not wanting to burden Akira with the decision he'd made...
Every time he thinks he can't cry anymore, the tears come from somewhere - but this time they just well up in his eye, spectral and glimmering despite how literally transparent he is.]
...Akira...
[He looks down, wiping at his eye with the back of a hand, letting out another shuddering breath.]
....I forgive you, you massive dumbass.
[His voice is next to cracking when he says it, but it's fond - oh so fond and loving.]
no subject
[but he isn't done just yet, because he thinks back to the conversation Rin had with Ichigo earlier, the one on which he eavesdropped]
I think everyone here has made a lot of mistakes. Bad decisions forced under pressure, and. . . [he shrugs] That sucks, you know? That sucks.
But nothing about what I chose to do is your fault. Absolutely nothing. And even if that isn't enough to convince you not to blame yourself, then remember-- we're not done yet.
[jerks a thumb towards the library, towards the locked door, towards the people behind them]
We still have a lot to do. We have to own our mistakes, hold our heads high and keep going, for the sake of everyone here.
no subject
Always, always astounded that Akira seems to just know the right things to say to get him back in the game, to get him standing on his own two feet again.
And while he'll always feel that he could have done something, that? Is enough to get him to stop wallowing in his own regret, to get him to face forward instead of focusing on the past.]
....You're right.
[He smiles - no, grins for the first time in what feels like forever, that fire and fierce determination returning slowly but surely to his eye.
They still have something to do, even when they're dead. And after all, shouldn't he of all people know that death isn't the end? He is, after all, a shinigami.]
There's no way I'm going to let it end here. Death isn't an end - it's a beginning.
[And -]
Besides - even if we don't get our bodies back, if we can get back to my world...I can just have Urahara make us all Gigais.
no subject
[giving into temptation, Akira extends a hand, palm facing upward, fingers slightly curled]
I'm counting on you.
no subject
I won't let you down.
[His expression turns serious, and a certain light gets into his eye - a look of vowing something to himself.]
Next time...I promise I'll protect you, Akira.
[There was only one other person he'd ever said that to, and he'd also loved her. While he's confessed his love before, this?
This feels so much more personal, somehow.]
no subject
I promise I'll let you.
[partners, next time. none of this Akira making executive decisions as a leader business. not again]
no subject
It has to be.]
...Thank you.
[His gaze turns just as soft, just as in love - softly smiling at the person who makes everything always feel okay again with such regularity.
Then something in his mind connects, and he slaps his head.]
-Shit, that's Right! My real body is back in my world! I never lost my actual one at all!
no subject
Your real body is. . . what?
[CONFUSED]
no subject
[So-]
My last memory was killing Yhwach as a shinigami before waking up here. If that's the case, then they would have to have put me in a fake body to be able to move around and interact in the living world.
no subject
So even if your shinigami body died here, your human body still exists. So if you're revived, it doesn't matter what state you're in, because you can just return to your real body.
no subject
[And now he has a point to make.]
And if we can get back to my world, even if the raccoons bring us back wrong - I can just get everyone a new body. Urahara owes me, anyway, and I know for a fact that they're indistinguishable from normal human bodies - because if they weren't, I wouldn't be here.
no subject
[he sounds impressed!!]
So long as we can escape from this library, then we can at least find some way to return to life.
no subject
Of course. Even if we couldn't, I'd take you all to soul society anyway. Soul Society owes me a lot for taking down Yhwach, even if it was a combined effort. So if anyone doesn't want to come back to life, then that's an option.
[Because it's hard NOT to hear conversations in here???]
no subject
Sometimes it isn't a matter of not wanting to. It's a matter of feeling like they have no choice.
[which is why he's trying to talk to Niles about this!!]
no subject
[He can't say he doesn't understand that kind of feeling, honestly. But at the same time, he'd want everyone to live - because none of them deserved to die like this, in this hell-hole of a school.]
...I just hope they realize they do have a choice. Everyone does.
no subject
Right.
[and Akira killed someone for that choice!!]